Welcome to stuarthowarth.co.uk

Hello and a very warm welcome to my website!

This website has been produced to coincide with the publication of my first book ‘Please Daddy, No’ which recounts my years growing up in an abusive household and then the difficulties I encountered later on in life after experiencing such atrocities.

The title of the book was factually chosen because these words were pleaded by me at a very early age to try and prevent what was to follow and sadly, before the death of my step-father in 2000.

His death should never have occurred and neither should the abuse beforehand. However, if mechanisms could have been in place to deal with the aftermath of child abuse and the trauma ultimately suffered then the situation could have been very different today.

Sadly we cannot change what has gone before but we can learn for the future and it is only through exposing the events of the past and to listening to what is said, that change can occur, a much needed change for children and society the world over.

My book covers many facets of my life from the feelings of hurt, abandonment, isolation, despair, depression of not knowing how to be and the constant search for answers. In August 2000 I was taken back to the only place I thought I could get them.

My actions have hurt a great many people throughout my life and I wish to publicly say that ‘I am sorry.’

My only defence is that my dysfunctional childhood led to many mental health issues and personality disorders which left unsupported, resulted in my actions. This is not an excuse but reality and today I have to live with what I have done.

One thing that I have realised is that I was often the prisoner of my own mind and the lack of honesty caused through the inability to trust, often kept me where I was and did not allow me to move forward. In essence I became a small boy locked in the body of a grown man and until I exposed my fears I would remain emotionally unbalanced and on the edge of suicide. At times suicide seemed the safest option.

If you have already bought my book then I want to say thank you for taking the time and courage to read about a topic that is often very unpalatable but one in which needs to be exposed to protect the children of today and the future.

Throughout this site you will find links to various other sites which may be able to offer help and assistance to those of you who still suffer.

My love, thoughts and prayers are extended to you today and everyday in the hope that you too may find recovery.

Stuart Howarth

Please click here for information about the upcoming child abuse rally in Manchester.